This is
a common problem for many people, the outside world, as it can be referred to,
feels that if you are intelligent or creative, then you can’t be mentally
ill. The stigma is that those who are
mentally ill commit crimes and cause trouble.
If you
look down through history some of the greatest minds have been or are mentally
ill. Famous authors, musician, painters,
doctors, etc. It seems that the creative
mind feeds off its self. These disorders
fuel the brain, whether it is depression, mania, hallucinations or anxiety,
each plays a part in shaping who we are and bringing our gifts to light. Recently Carrie Fisher passed away, a great voice for bringing Mental Illness to light. She had an amazing gift and used it to bring joy to others through her movies and understanding through her work to fight the stigma of these illnesses.
I wish I could explain how it all works, but
the one thing I can agree with, is what Brian Wilson of the Beach Boys spoke of
in a 2002 interview. *In 2002, he spoke of how the disorder
affects his creativity, explaining: "I haven't been able to write anything
for three years. I think I need the demons in order to write, but the demons
have gone. It bothers me a lot. I've tried and tried, but I just can't seem to
find a melody.* There is a lot of truth in what he says, our brains are meant to work a certain way for us and to change that, changes who we are.
I’ve
been hospitalized a few times and what I learned there or was told was that I
was too intelligent! I was to
analytical! I became friends with the art therapist, she would push me to do things
differently, to not analyze, to do something that I haven’t done before. It was a great challenge for me because it’s
not who I am. It is a quandary we often find ourselves in
and not one that we can answer or control.
While I
will admit it is a nuisance at times, it helps me to be the
best I can be at my craft – writing and photography. I believe it is the complexity of my brain
that allows me to do these things, to craft stories, to see things in nature
that others may not see and share that through my photography. Would I want it to be different? That’s
actually a hard question to answer, while yes to be without my illness
would be great, no more medications, doctor visits, no mood swings and all the
things that go along with it, however, I wouldn’t be ME. I curse this illness most days, but it is
because of it that I am able to do what I do.
My brain, while many would see it as not working correctly, I feel works
just fine. Yes, I have challenges, but
doesn’t everyone?
The
thing is, beyond all the talk, stigma and misunderstanding, there is the knowledge
that we are gifted because we are fighting harder than we ever thought we would
be able to and that in itself is worth bragging about. So, be creative, be loud, be funny and let the world know that this is what Mental Illness looks like.
No comments:
Post a Comment