Recently we took a trip back to the United States from Australia. For those who have never done that sort of
flight let’s just say it’s not for the faint of heart. A rough total of 23 hours in the air and
another 10+ hours in layovers take a lot out of you, not only physically but
for those who live with mental illness, mentally as well.
Preparation is the key to it all, making sure medications are packed
and are taken as close to normal time as possible. That is probably the easiest part, the rest
can leave you feeling off, confused, tired, depressed, and manic and in some
cases psychotic. I know it does not seem
like it’s worth it, but travelling is a chance to see the world and the
sacrifices that are made are worth it if taken care of in the right way. We were not made to stay in one place, there
is so much to explore and experience that our mental health should not keep us
from that. However, having these
illnesses can add an element of difficulty, especially when they
involve long flights and most importantly a lack of preparation.
Sadly I fell into the latter category; I was ill prepared for the trip,
mentally. I had lists for what needed to
be packed, papers printed for hotels, car rental, site seeing, flights and
visas. I had an itinerary planned and
ready to go and waited impatiently for the day to come. We even arrived at the airport 90 minutes
before it opened.
What I didn’t plan
for, however, was my mental health. I knew in the back of my mind that it could become an issue, lack of
sleep and a disruption of a regular routine has been known to cause me problems
in the past. I told myself that was in
the past, I was smarter now and could handle this without a problem. I knew jet lag would be an issue, but with a
little sleep and some down time there would be no problems, turns out that I
was only half right.
Flying to U.S. was OK, jet lag was minimal – though I was tired – I
felt good and we had a fantastic time visiting New York City. I had never been to Central Park or Time
Square so I felt like a little kid exploring for the first time. We visited
with friends, toured the battlefields of Gettysburg and did a little
shopping. All this made the fact that
I was tired seem irrelevant, there was so much to see and do I was on top of
the world.
When the time came to return back Australia, I hoped it be just as
easy. I would love to be able to say it happened that way, but after four days
of being back home, I have not slept for more than 5 or 6 hours a night, I’m irritable, moody, depressed, hypo-manic and fear psychosis isn’t far behind. The emotions of visiting my home left me with
feelings of nostalgia and the emotions of coming to terms with who I am
now. I looked forward to returning to
work when we returned, but since we live in a resort town winter is very slow
and it is possible I will be out of work for the next 3 months. Put all these things together and I am
struggling to find my footing once again.
All the progress I made over the last year seems to have dissipated over
the Pacific Ocean. I am struggling to focus and return to a schedule and
routine that I am familiar with and helps me be the person I want to be, the
writer, photographer and person who loves life and battles the demons with
strength and determination.
I do not say these things to deter anyone from travelling, it is
actually the opposite. I want people to
know that, yes travel can be a challenge if not handled correctly. There is planning that needs to be done not
only with what you will pack and things you will do, but also how you will
handle jet lag or a disruption in your daily routine. These two topics alone should be at the top of the list when preparing for a trip.
It is very easy for a slight relapse to make a huge difference not only
in your holiday, but in the return home as well.
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