“Z” is for Zero Symptoms #atozblogchallenge

“If a person doesn’t achieve zero symptoms, they haven’t failed, but if they are never given the opportunity to achieve that goal, the system has failed them.”    Allen Doederlein, DBSA President

 

What is the first thing you strive for when you have a cold, no symptoms, the ability to breathe again, no coughing or fever?  A cancer patient has a goal of no cancerous cells, remission.  There is a new movement for those who live with mental illness that tackles this topic, the goal for total remission, the ability to live with no symptoms. 

Target Zero to Thrive was a month-long  campaign in April to bring mental health professionals, researchers and those who live with a mental illness to work toward a goal of zero symptoms, and not settle for just feeling better.  That has been the goal in the past, to simple control symptoms and hope they do not come back.  We followed this protocol because that is the way it has always been done, but no more.  There is a better life out there, and it is time we found it. 

Some will look at this and think that maintaining stability is the same thing; however, it may only bring temporary relief  that is often fleeting, and the symptoms persist but to a lesser degree.  The true goal here is to eliminate the symptoms all together and allow each person the ability to thrive in their lives and not worry about when their illness returns.   Without the opportunity to achieve the goal of zero, the system has not done all it can to help.  Why should we settle for just good enough, when there is so much more to strive for?  

I have lived with mental illness for nearly 20 years in that amount of time I have seen many doctors and there has never been a real interest in finding a way to control how I feel daily;  it has always been a matter of what medication will make you feel better for the longest period of time, or at least until I saw  them again.  This new idea of working toward total remission is a welcome change in the way of thinking, hope in a sea of medications and doctor visits with nothing to show for it but bills and continued depression, mania and psychosis.

May has been dubbed Mental Health Awareness Month, I hope throughout the next 31 days people are made aware of what we live with and what can be done to help make each day better than the one before.  The media portrays mental illness in one way,  let’s change their perception. 

“O” is for Obstacle #atozblogchallenge

Picture for a moment a track race, there are many hurdles the runners need to jump to get to the finish line, each one must be crossed at the precise time in order to win; it takes practice, courage, determination and above all the dedication to make the dream come true.  You are probably wondering by this point how this all pertains to mental illness; you would be surprised.  

My doctors consider me a challenge; I have stumped them more times than I can remember, they try a treatment that has worked for years, and I am not able to either take a certain medication, or it has an opposite reaction on me; I have had my psychiatrist just sit and shake his head at me in disbelief.  Part of me thinks he enjoys it because he is a researcher as well, and he enjoys the mystery.  However, I regress; each of these things is an obstacle; each part of my illness is one more jump I have to make in order to live free of what the next minute is going to bring me.  

Each of my diagnoses is an obstacle for me; the letters define an instant in time that I felt either out of control or an instance when my mind turned on me.  I face the obstacles of PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder) because of years of abuse. I have spent years fighting to get back what was taken from me; I still get angry and look for ways to forget and move on, but the wall is there, and I am slowly climbing to the top, one day I will be able to look down and say I made it and can see the other side. 

When it comes to DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) however, it becomes more challenging.  The little darlings who live inside my head enjoy the games they play with me, over the years I have come to know them, why they exist and how to handle them, for the most part, but they remain a part of me.  The obstacle with this illness is the fact that I am used to not having to face crisis or pain I find it difficult to let go of each personality because they have gotten me through so much, and I was never really given the opportunity to do it on my own, now I am trying to learn. 

Bipolar Disorder and Anxiety create a havoc that can last for days, weeks or even months at a time, each illness on it’s own has the ability to weaken the soul and fighting takes more energy than you think you have in you, but if you believe you are strong and have faith it is possible.  The trick to these two illnesses is learning the triggers or obstacles that get in way and cause the moods to change suddenly. 

 

Put it all together the hurdles seem endless, overwhelming and unobtainable.  I used to think that as well, but with each day I came closer to the answer, I find that one instance where a past trigger may have sent me into a tailspin and this time I simply blinked, and it was gone.  I smile and know that one more challenge has been met, now on to the next one. 

What are the obstacles in your life?  What makes you cringe when you are faced with what seems like an unobtainable hurdle?